The Poor Man's Poker League is a poker tournament that plays every other Saturday, in several different locations.

02/28/2009 - Holly is round 5 Champion!

As per usual, lets all give a big round of applause to all those who made it into the top 10 for the final game of season 5 of the Poor Mans Poker League!

A special congratulations goes to Holly for taking the round 5 poor mans poker league championship bracelet home with her! Luckily the cat's stayed in their houses.

The championship game turned out to be a battle of the brightest and best the garage has ever seen, and in the end, The..., well, Holly came out on top. There was no sexual inuendo, you pervert.

Congratulations also go to Tony A. and Malcolm for taking second and third, respectively!

02/15/2009 - Game 10 - The conclusion of season 5!

Ladies and gentlemen, lets all give a big round of applause to all those who made it into the top 10 for the final game of seaspm 5 of the Poor Mans Poker League!

Congrats to Tony A., Lori B., Big gay Ed, Holly, Malcolm, Michael, Connie, Jason, Lora, and last but not least, Tony C! You can all go fuck yourselves.

We had a tight season this time around, with the difference between 10th and 11th place a mere .2 points. Hell, the difference between 10th and 15th place was only 1.1 points!

As I recall it, Jason, the two Tony's, and League Hostess Lora went to the final 4-way battle of season 5, with the flukemaster taking 4th place to secure his top 10 status for good. The two Tony's battled it out with Mr. Pirogi himself finally coming out on top. Not to be outdone, Lora smashed Mr. Pirogi in the face to take first place.

The final tournament of champions will be held February 21st, 2009 at SEVEN THIRTY PM. This is important folks. You don't show up late to the World Series of Poker, and you damn sure don't show up late to the FInal Game of the Poor Man's Poker League!

Everyone and everyones sisters uncles cousins friends neighbors are welcome to show up whenever the hell they feel like it. We'll either be playing a cash game to start, or we could start a tourney game, depending on the general consensus. Blackjack may or may not happen!

After the final tournament of champions we will be taking a 2 week hiatus, and Season 6 will commence on March 21st 2009. If you show up on March 7th, you'll be promptly greeted by ... nobody. And you'll be lonely. We don't want to see you cry.

01/28/2009 - The game before the final - Tony A wins it all

Game 9 has come and gone, and finally Malcolm did not win. A staggering 18 people showed up to game 9 of the Poor Man's Poker League for a long night of Hold Em, blackjack, "hi-lo" (acey-deucey), Omaha, and more! Of course that was in the cash game, lets move on to the game that really matters, the tournament game!

The final four was Lori B, Greg, Myself (Eric) and Tony A., with Greg taking a respectable 4th place and 2.8 points. I bowed out in third place to let Tony and Lori battle it out for first. After 963 Jack Links all in moments, Tony finally all in'd Lori to her final half a chip, and that's how the west was won.

The west side I guess. Of the garage.

February 7th will be our 10th and FINAL GAME of round 5 of the Poor Man's Poker League before the Tournament of Champions is held, two weeks after that.

To Lori G, Chip, Joe H, and Alan: It'd be totally ok if you didn't make it to game 10. We'll miss you, but we'll manage to sleep at night.

01/11/2009 - Game 8 -- How gay does the game of poker get?

Pretty gay evidently. After a long-awaited update of a certain site, 20 some odd people trekked through the 14 feet of snow, uphill both ways barefoot with glass in their ass, and showed up for game 8 of the Poor Man's Poker League.

Who won? Malcolm, for the second time in a row, good job ole chap, nice comeback! Joe H. somehow managed to stay in till heads up again, and took a respectable yet laughable 2nd place.

3rd and 4th place go to newcomer Chris P. and Greg, respectively.

Much thanks to Tony C. and the jet engine in the garage. May nobody ever whine or complain about being cold ever again, whiny bitches.

01/11/2009 - Game 7, who the hell cares

That's right, I'm making the update for game 7 the night of game 8. And I don't even care.

I less than remember anything about game 7, so heres what allegedly happened:

Malcolm and Alan went heads up with Malcolm eventually knocking Alan out. Before that, newcomer Jason P. and and Connie were involved in the final 4, Jason P. triumphing over Connie for third place.

Then 2 days later my second kid was born. So screw you if you got a problem with me not updating.

12/16/2008 - Game 6 goes down without a fight

But Holly didn't. No sir, in fact she tried to fight the ceiling for her terrible first-out, i-knew-better-than-to-call-with-the-nut-flush, this is the worst hand ever, call against...somebody, probably Chip. Chip decided he was employed by the poker god's and it was his personal mission, nay, obligation to take every single person out of the game.

After all was said and done, chip had the majority of the bounty chips, and took a few people out who didn't participate in the bounty chip celebrations.

All in all, a good night was had, especially after drunk Ed and his drunk dudashes showed up and ruined the game of poker. The business? Jason took first, technically splitting with it with his first-time brother, Jamie. Third was Chip and 4th place honorable mention must go to Mark!

That's all until next time. Oh yes, yours truly has been knocked out of the top ten standings. Don't you worry your silly little ass, I'll be back.

12/07/2008 - Game 5, yet another newcomer wins, Ed loses, is gay

We're now halfway through season 5! The significant other of Malcolm, Angel, took first place at game 5, and more importantly, showed Ed that women do have a place in poker, and gay men do not!

I was busy losing an asston of money in the cash game while the final table was going on, but from what I hear, it was an epic battle to the death. Angel was down to very very little chips at one point, but the poker gods smiled upon her after realizing it was her first tournament game. Good job taking Ed out like last weeks turkey carcass!

Honorable mentions go to the luckiest woman in poker, Holly, and the long haired wonder Michael, as well as Rio, his pampered little dog. Look for Rio to show up next week in Michaels man purse.

Another honorable mention, because I said so, goes to ME! For still hanging in the top ten by 1 tenth of a point. Greg, you're busy for the next 10 weeks, sorry you can't make it.

Lets also not forget an honorable mention to the Detroit Lions, for being the worst team in the history of sports. The lions need a movie made about them. Working title: "The epic saga of a sucktastic sports team."

//go chargers...?

11/22/2008 - Game 4, Connie takes 1st for the first time!

That's right ladies and gentlemen, the poor mans poker league's resident pirogi maker, Connie, has made her own history as she takes 1st place for the first time ever!

Suckout City: It seemed that, in every god damn hand, the 2nd best hand won. In the cash games, in the tournament, on the way home at the gas station, everywhere, every hand, everybody... the winning hand never won. Pocket aces? No good, river flush. Flop a boat? Tough shit, quads on the river. Worst weekend of poker in history, statistically.

But lets get back to business, shall we? Game 4 was the first time in PMPL history that we made use of bounties, as discussed in the forums. If I recall correctly, Connie cashed out with 6 bounty chips, a staggering amount. As it were, 2nd Place Tony A cashed out with a staggering...zero. I believe the bounty chips were well received and we shall be doing it in the future. No bad beat pot. Ever. Don't even mention a bad beat pot. Bad what? You god damn right bad nothin.

Anyway, Sorta newcomer (and chief sucker-outer on the river) David took 3rd place after only 2 appearances at the Poor Man's Poker League, and of course Lori G took 4th after dominating the lives of people at her table in the beginning of the game.

Next week we'll all be stuffed up with muffins and much too much stuffin, not to mention the turkey, but we'll still be playing that Saturday at 7:30PM!!!

To those that go to "that other poker game", it will be held on wednesday, same time, same place, as opposed to a buncha random dudes playing poker on thanksgiving night.

Peace to all and to all a good night. Fuck you if you got a problem with me taking a week to update.

11/03/2008 - Game 3. Nice.

Game 3 kicked off with yet some more new faces. A total of 20 people showed, including a boss of a webmaster, and a boss of a police officer. There's too many bosses around.

At any rate, the final table consisted of Yours truly, Greg, Holly, and Lori B, along with some other nobodies that no one cares about. Going into 4-way play, My chip stack reached the outer limits of Wayne County, yet the blinds managed to cut me down to a small, non-manly, humbling short stub. That's what she said.

Taking 4th place and 3.1 points was myself, with Greg taking 3rd to leave the two ladies, or at least that's what they say, to battle it out between themselves. Holly eventually lost all my chips to Lori B, the reigning PMPL champion of the world and world series of poker (of the poor mans variety) bracelet holder.

We'll be playing game 4 at the same time as always. Not on time. Do not forget to vote tomorrow! Remember, Kwame can't run this year, or next, or the next year after that, but just remember to keep him in your thoughts and prayers, and vote Kwame in 2013!

10/23/2008 - Game 2 brought some new faces, no pocket aces

Welcome everybody to game 2 of the World Famous Poor Mans Poker League, where fortunes are won and lost in increments of $.50!

Game two kicked off with a few new faces, none of whom will get mentioned because they were nowhere near top 4 places! Michael, However, will get a mention, for taking first place and 6.1 points after a heads up poker battle of the poker gods, with Lori G. coming up second. Third place was awarded to Lori B, and fourth place goes to Lora. Michael must have felt quite uncomfortable with the abnormal levels of estrogen surrounding him. I think he is on their cycle now...

At any rate, come one come all to Game 3 which will be held exactly 14 days from Game 2, at the same place, same time!

I'll keep mentioning poker and blackjack and online gaming here because I'm selling links to try and make up for the 80 bucks a month I pay to keep this (and many other) websites up and running. Poker poker poker!

10/07/2008 - Season 5 kicks off with Gay Ed taking 1st!

That's right ladies and gentlemen, for the first time in PMPL history, we take no breaks, we wait no time, we go right from the final game of season 4 right into the first game of season 5.

It was a cool October night, and the gays were waiting to make their presence known. Ed eventually took Holly out of commission in a heads up battle of who-the-fuck-cares. Honorable mention goes to Alan and Tony A (AKA Ray Liotta Laugh) for taking 3rd and 4th place, respectively, in the first game of season 5.

The fridge in the garage was a blast, as was the first introduction of the fireplace since early in season 4. I, however, decided to wear shorts and a T-Shirt, when it was 40 degrees out. I never claimed to be intelligent.

In other news, I will never, ever, ever, as long as i live and as long as poker remains a game, call anything with Jack 10 Suited, especially not diamonds. Good hand you pirogi makin half-gay.

10/05/2008 - News coming Soon!

soon as lora gets me the latest standings. check out round 4 of PMPL for the last update until then!

plants